FEATURE #1 FROM MY FUTURE BOOK!!

Hey friends! To keep myself on my targeted deadlines, and to present a little taste of what will be coming from my book, I have decided to share a piece twice a week with you throughout May! The basis of my book is founded in being happy and whole; targeting the three aspects of daily life that I have found brought me genuine happiness! Without a doubt in my mind or heart, I feel that it is essential to nurture your physical, mental, and spiritual health daily, in order to prosper and truly make the most out of each day. I hope that you enjoy these little shares, and I look forward to presenting and sharing the completed works with you soon! With love, Leeana Today's excerpt- Focusing on spiritual health: SPIRITUAL WORKOUT: Revelation 21:4 “ 'He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” We are quick to see, and remember, the beauty of life as we are in the throes of it; picnics and swimming in the summer, family holidays, winter sports and snowmen, career advances, that first kiss. But as humans, we tend to shy away from keeping the dark times in near thought; broken hearts, the passing of people we love, failing at endeavors. Just as soon as we emerge from a seemingly bad moment or phase in our lives, we want to run and hide from it. What if we were able to keep both the dark and light in our life in equal rank? It's the hard times that make us want to grow; without starting at a bottom, what room would there be to prosper and rise? In this Revelation passage, we are reminded that we have a forever home with our Creator. No matter what we face in life, good or bad, we have a never-ending future of peace, even after we leave the physical realm of Earth. Each struggle and challenge we are dealt is a chance to grow as a person, for ourselves and for others. If we succumb to even the smallest of hard times, we allow the possibility of acting as victims, keeping us from the true joys that we may have not been graced with yet. Life must have balance; we cannot appreciate the good fully without the stark difference of the bad. Cherish ALL the things that come about in your daily existence, as they serve a purpose in one way or another! Today's meditation: I am capable of working through the hard times in life. I will breathe through this process, accept the negative and turn it into a positive, and not play a victim. I welcome both good and bad happenings, for I know each have their place in the greater scheme of my life.

The seasons of our lives

Most days I am grateful that our lives have ebbs and flows that point us in new directions. But other times, like earlier this morning, it's hard to bear the truth that our relationships with people will come and go. That they will change from a vast intensity to a minor "like" on the internet. I see this happen when one of us happen to move, when one of us change an aspect of our life as we breach adulthood, when one of us change our sexual or life-partner relationships. I have felt this change of tide many times before, as is to be expected, and I know it will happen several times just yet. But that doesn't change the feeling that comes with it. A sense of being pushed away, a sense of mourning over what was. How many photos of friends together and you divided before you can't help but feel the human pangs of loneliness? Yes, these are the feelings and moments and thoughts that troubled me earlier. But then I was reminded that- this happens often, I have probably made others feel this same way, and everything happens for a reason. Here I am lamenting over spending time with people when I need to devote my time to working on my book, studying, and building my independent business. Here is the extra time I actually need, being handed to me by formerly close friends now living their night lives with others. And truth be told, I only appreciate a nice late night once or twice a week. I'm quite fond of my 10pm turn ins with my husband. I like giving my body the peace it needs to recharge. After all, that is what I'm chasing with my career, isn't it?! To be a pillar of health and wellness, to give it to others. Sleep is part of that equation. So, I started this day troubled. But with a little reflection, I realized I am exactly where I need to be for my goals, and they are exactly where they need to be in their lives, or at least where they choose to be at the moment. I have to push for ME, for my FAMILY, that is what is first in my life. Because friendships arrive boisterously in our timeline as needed, and then stay or dilute as the need wains. This evening, I get to share my time with my family, and I couldn't ask for anything more. XO

Finding balance

When we tackle the things in life that helped lead us to our calling, it's important to keep balance in mind. Right now, as I often do, I'm dealing with the trouble of trying to make a schedule for myself to keep my life in balance. I have to balance my family, my friends, work, growing, As well as achieving the things I need to that will support my future career goals. Amidst that, I have to balance my as well as achieving the things I need to that will support my future career goals. Amidst that, I have to maintain my health and fitness own personal own personal health and fitness routine and goals. Sometimes I do much better at different tasks with a clear-cut goal and end in sight. For instance, in my fitness coaching career, my mentor has set a goal for me that I am trying to achieve. It's a big goal in a short amount of time, but the pressure makes me want to push that much harder. I considered signing up for a fitness competition at the end of the year or next year, but I also have to know certain limits and boundaries. I definitely believe that I will compete at least once in my life, but the fact is that Harry and I are trying to get pregnant right now, and I need to make my goals match. It does not make sense for me to try and get pregnant and also try to bulk and cut and follow a very precise meal plan when my body has other jobs to do right now. That doesn't mean that I'm not still lifting and trying to get my body in peak physical condition, it just means I have to give it one important task at a time. Balance. Slowly but surely I'm getting the hang of this. I plan on writing up a schedule for my days so that I stay focused on my goals and don't skip anything, but also don't take away from my family time. I don't think it's impossible to be an entrepreneur and still maintain a healthy social life. Besides, there is no trade off for time with my family and friends. No courier or success would be worth it without the people I love by my side. If you recognize that something needs balance in your life, whether it's an action or your words or your routine, I pray that you take the steps to find the balance that works for you. Have a great Thursday!

The calm before the storm

Whew. I'm in one of those phases of life where there is A LOT going on, and all I can think about is how badly I want to lay on my couch and watch television! Last week focused heavily on church, Holy Week, and preparing for the family to come over on Easter Sunday. This week is full of night shifts, last minute preparations for my dear friends Cori and Johnny's wedding, a trip to visit a friend out of town, and then the actual festivities of the weekend for the wedding. Not to mention my mother in law's knee surgery got bumped up to this Friday, so I will need to check in on her at some point. I'm grateful for such a vibrant, eventful life, but I am MORE than excited for next week to be a little calmer! I have more day shifts than night which means more dinner and cuddles with my hubby. And I refuse to make any set plans; if something comes up that fits the time and mood, I'll be all in, but I want the freedom to just be a couch potato! (Figuratively, my workouts are going to be on point from now on!) Easter was so special to me, for many reasons, but it's time to get focused again. My belly has been very upset with my holiday decisions! From moments of feeling nauseous and the least bit hungry to eating more than necessary, thus leading back to feeling poopy. Ha! The vicious cycle! My morning business work is done, my breakfast Shakeo has me all energized... time to finish bridesmaid bouquets and then crush my leg day!! Happy Tuesday, people!

Returning to my writing!

Oh blog. The phases we go through together! I come and write daily for some time and then leave you high and dry. No more- I promise! This Lenten holiday has really invigorated me with new life. I'm focusing on my fitness business more to build it up so that it could be my full time HAPPY career someday, sooner than later. I'm being open and honest about my faith and trust in Jesus more on social media. True story- I didn't want to pretend I was going to give up something material for Lent (c'mon, I don't even make New Years Resolutions, gotta start small!), so I made the decision to give up a fear instead: no more fear of posting my faithfulness on social media and worrying about people judging me. Non-believers, friends of mine who have seen me when I was a negative agnostic, people who consider those that are open with their faith ignorant simply because they don't share that faith. I wanted to give that up, because I want to truly share love like Christ did. And the way I can do that is by sharing my own love, which stems from a love given to me by He who died for me. Holy Week put a lot of intense feelings in my heart that I haven't had since I was a pre-teen and decided to get baptized. It feels good to have this revived yet new life in me, so fitting for Lent. And I will have Sundays and Thursdays off from now on, which means this girl is getting back into the choir!!!!!!!!!! In the mean time, I do love my job at The Fresh Market. It's nice to help people with healthy food options and get a discount on them myself! Our store ranked #9 on the Consumer Report for top grocery stores in the US! How cool is that?! I think that once my at home business takes off and I'm able to make income off of it to not have another job, I'd still like to work two or three days a week there to stay around all the pretty food ;) My one online summer class will be starting next month- just my English 2. I haven't 100% decided what I want to do yet, but I'm really leaning towards nutritional science. I think that could help me incredibly with fitness clients, as well as my long term dream to help men & women recover from eating disorders. Our bathroom is also coming along beautifully, which brings some peace! I'm praying it's done before the summer weather starts so we can get our house back in order before cookout season starts! Well, this will be a short catch up post- I have many errands to do before work and then tomorrow is a magnificent Easter celebration at our home! Hope you are all well and living life fully this Holy Week! Love Lee

Continually growing/ ever changing

It's that time again- the time where i examine my life and what is in it and how i feel about the current and the lacking. I think i've come to the realizatiom that there are very few things that i feel 100% about in this life; i know without a doubt i married my soul mate, i know for certain that i want to have a child when it's meant to happen, my family will always ne incredibly important and hold precedent over most other things, i'm eternally connected to a Divine Presence from an interna source, my childhood was incredible regardless of unique quirks, and i need to have a life full of helping people, in any form or way possible. Now, i say that i "think" i came to this conclusion because aside from my feelings on those specific things, my heart and mind change constantly. Sometimes daily. As i sit here in the tattoo shop, helping out by working on my day off from the lab, i feel confused about my career changes. I know that the lab experience will bring me benefits down the road, but my pride feels like a contender with my worth. A basic, boring job with horroble hours and horrible pay, but potential for career benefits. Compares to this pleasant, artistic, open job with decent pay. Not to mention, connecting a friens to take my place, so the spot i feel a sudden yearning for is not even available. While these days and weeks fly by into months and years, i try to remember that by summer i should be certified for phlebotomy and have more options arise. By summer, things could possibly be better. I just have to try and squeeze two pennies together to survive until then. I just have to get by on the simple things. I need to put more positive things into my heart so that the long boring nighta of underappreciated work don't break me down before i have the chance to reach my potential. And i have to stay free on myself to know that there is no mold or career that i must fit or follow. Because the path always appears to be paved in gold but has many cracks and bumps. The "career" that has turned out to be a shit show. The job that contained more of my heart than i realized. The future, that has yet to be molded and grow.

Ready & willing

I tend to feel motivated in my life as a whole. That is to say, when i'm on- i'm on! And when i'm gone- oh brother. Returning to my sober lifestyle has brought along the wave of gratitude and dedication that i've needed in all aspects of my life. God has blessed me with the ability to have an open and honest communication level with my husband, so when he bought us gym memberships because my lack of self confidence was so lacking, i knew it was a sign. "Hey, kid, you're working hard to do right again... Do it for yourself, too." And so my exercising has come back around, which in turn prompted my eating to right itself, which leads to an overall boost- in confidence and actual happiness. I'm on. So now i'm chasing this different desire. How do i KEEP this positive flow, this dedication to goodness for myself and others? I don't want to have to mend myself and my relationships and my attitudes every few months or years- i want it longterm. And the only answer i can see is: do the work. Be honest to others so i can be honest with myself and keep moving forward rather than falling back on excuses. I'm trying to get my career goals in line, making recent modifications to previous goals. I'm trying to get my family values and goals in line, trying to a good wife and life partner. I'm getting my food thoughts in line, relying more on science and less on the voice in my head that tries to lure me back to my eating disorders. And i have my fitness goals back on track- because it brings me self empowerment and joy. Transforming from the past of wanting to have nothing but bones and skin to wanting to build muscle and be athletically fit is a BIG DEAL to me. So i try to nurture this feeling when it is here, planning workouts and setting goals, because i don't want it to leave. Well, the time has come to try to make these things life long and not just temporary. Revisiting my 3rd step in my recovery is helping me tremendously to grow. Seriously, it's moving mountains in my heart. Before I go, I'll share the 3rd step prayer. Because whether you're recovering from addiction or just living today as a human, this prayer is magnificent for all of us. "God, I offer myself to Thee- To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" Happy living (not just existing), friends.