New career goals

Working in the lab is lovely... I am gaining experience in a medical lab, I am working in the city for the first time (something I have deemed as an "adult" thing to do since i was younger) , and I am constantly learning new things. That being said, I have learned a few things about the career I was thinking about pursuing. For instance, medical laboratory technicians undergo a few semesters of clinical chemistry. They also stand around in my lab talking gossip or scurry from machine to machine with various samples/specimens in hand. I see this and I think... is it worth the money? First, there is how much money I'd have to pay for school. Yes, I will have some assistance from AHN now, but there is no promise of full reimbursement. The eventual pay is nice. But as technology changes, would I have to go back to school to stay up to date with the machines? One of the great techs that has been here for quite some time told me about one of the big layoffs in the past. At the very heart of it all, I am noticing two fears that scream out to me: 1. Am I smart enough to handle that schooling/ job? 2. Will I become bored quickly without the ability to have social experiences? So, I am packing my bags from Dreamland in Lab Tech World and moving to Phlebotomy city. I am in the process of registering for phlebotomy classes, and honestly, I feel excited already! Hahaha- nothing is final, started, or anything, and already it feels like the right move. Perhaps something will move me that makes me realize I actually do want to pursue nursing, but for now, I am comfortable with this decision to change my career goals. After today's shift, I'm off to the last night of filming for The 11th Hour!!! It's bittersweet; I'm grateful to not have the weekly commitment because I feel run down right now, but I will miss acting and shooting with these goofballs. I'm so excited for April to be able to see it in the theater. But more than anything, I'm trying to focus on positivity and getting back in shape. I feel like I have been in a dual funk- physical and emotional. Time to get back into the heart of this season and focus on advent, Jesus, and the great things in my life and get the heck outta my head!

Vaccines, shmaccines

See, the thing I hate about vaccines is.... Okay, I don't hate everything. Preventing polio, I get that. But let's talk about the flu vaccination. I am a generally healthy woman with a mostly good diet that gets in a moderate amount of physical activity, and when i actually work out a SUPERB amount of physical activity! But working in a hospital, even in the lab, I am required to get the flu vaccine. I had the option to not get it done and read through some "educational" material online and sign off on it. Sadly though, as a newer hire, I had issues with the website that Highmark was using. Lucky me! After calling three separate departments, filing an online problem form, and visiting the employee health office only to be told I needed to call yet another department, I caved and got the shot. Deadlines and phonecalls made my head explode and I gave in. So today? Yep, I'm dealing with an unstuffable stuffy nose. My arm where I got the shot already feels better, but the rest of me? Exhausted and sore. Coooooool. :p This is why this healthy woman that takes vitamins almost regularly and hardly ever gets sick thinks that the flu vaccine is not made for her. And now another fun road block- my general exhaustion. English class- final research paper turned in, final group presentation done, nothing left to worry about. Pscyh class- have to write final paper but it will be a cinch and isn't due for two weeks, not much to worry about. Bio- OH BROTHER.... Felt like crap today, mentally mostly, and skipped my last lecture class. Thankfully I had the notes printed out already, but still there is definitely a bonus to discussing the topics with her and knowing exactly how she wants to define things. And Monday I'll be jumping right into the lab final. Ugh. At least I have the cell numbers of my lab group partners; I'll pick their brains later as to what we went over in class today so I'm prepared. But that's not all! Monday is just the LAB final... Wednesday is the lecture final! Oh yay! I guess I'm just stressing over it because I have so much chemistry to look forward to that I need to grasp this class to move on. At least in my mind. Plus, I feel completely confident about my english and psych class based on the overall semester and high school overall too. Bio is my wildcard though. Well, off to work to sit and feel miserable. Hopefully these symptoms go away soon so I can get back to cramming life in. But why oh why can't I just sit at home and watch Grey's Anatomy under my blanket with my fur nuggets and the beautiful grey skies all day?!?!?!?! ;p

Some things about today:

School is so close to done that I can taste it. Well, this semester anyway. Thank. God. I am looking forward to a small break before my online classes. My final english presentation went superb. I got to work mega early and was able to run down to Crazy Mocha. FIRST PAYCHECK ON FRIDAY IN AWHILE- YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES. So many bills/responsibilities to be paid and I'm not even mad about it. It just feels good to know money will be in my account again. First time since my last day at the tattoo shop, November 15th- HOLY CANNOLI. welp, leaving work... time to get home, snuggle my man, and do my advent study for the day.

Slow Saturdays at work.

The lab is fairly dead here on the weekend. So I'm enjoying a little moment to catch up on here and look up some random Advent ideas. Now that Thanksgiving has passed, I hop entirely on the Christmas train!!! I am hoping to get all our Christmas decorations up by Sunday or Monday. This Thanksgiving was so beautiful. Everyone seemed to have a great time, all the food came out delicious, and I stayed fairly prepared the days before so that the holiday wasn't entirely hectic. Harry even watched a Charlie Brown Thanksgiving with me and we passed out on the couch fairly early! my sweetheart. The roads were HORRIBLE the next day, though. Black ice everywhere. I was stuck in the same spot in traffic for about 40 minutes. Then today the roads were fine... but my head wasn't! I randomly woke up at 4am, tossed and turned and somehow managed to stuff my phone under my pillow, so I never heard my alarm at 5am. Ended up coming in 40mins late for work -_- Not to mention I had a lovely headache for some reason. Hopefully I'm still just exhausted from trying to adjust to my new life schedule, and I'm not catching Harry's germs. I plan on taking it easy tonight (no filming till next weekend with the holiday), probably just having a couch & movie date with Amber and Harry. Did anyone take part in the insanity better known as Black Friday? I truly have no desire to ever go... well, only if someone else drove. Because parking lots drive me CRAZY around this time of year! I couldn't help myself... I made two small purchases online AHHHH! Hahaha I'm horrible. Pay Pal credit is the worst thing that ever happened, I swear! I cut up all my other cards but I can't cut that up so it continuously taunts me. ANYHOOOOO, the shopping deals suckered me in for two things I've been eyeing up for awhile now- I got a sweatshirt that says "Jesus loves this hot mess" and a tee shirt that says "Proverbs 31 Wifey" ... they are gorgeoussss! I'm probably going to get one of the Wifey tees for Holly for Christmas. Or soon hahaha. The company is Be Still if any of you gals are interested. I am SO excited for tomorrow! This is what my FANTASTIC Sunday will be made up of: Morning/ Afternoon- church with grandma and then starting the She Reads Truth Advent workbook together! Mid-day- decorating the house and snuggling the hubby and fur babies. Night- pie night at the home group!!! Sundays are always my most spiritually reinvigorating day. I look forward to Sunday every single week. I get my Christian fulfillment, I get my family fulfillment, and I get my recovery fulfillment. Perfection. Well, I'm off to see if any specimens have come in and prepare for lunch. Hope yinz guys have a magnificent weekend!

Pre-Thanksgiving catchup

Hello, internet! Tomorrow is the second big holiday of the end of the year, and i am EXCITED! Of course, some family drama was unfolded, but thankfully, has been resolved quickly. Or at least i hope. I am hopeful that one day that will not occur anymore, but i also know we always find a way to work around it. Anyhoo! SO excited to not have class this morning!! I didn't get to sleep in because of the aforementioned drama but at least i get to snuggle the fur babies  under blankets and watch tv before work. And then tonight- THE COOKING BEGINS!!!!!!! I just want that to get here, the cooking and family and the day off. Not to mention... TOMORROW IS ONE MONTH SOBER!!!! By the grace of God, i was able to realize the mistake i made with drinking again, although only with the guidance and help of my precious husband. I'm still trying to figure out where i can go to get my one month coin; i don't want to leave the family dinner early tomorrow but i also made plans with amber on friday so i can't go to baldwin now. We'll see.
I'll update later with the menu for tomorrow! :)

Update time!

Oh, life. You always have a way of getting crazy and keeping me from posting blogs! ;p
So the newest job updates: I officially got hired by Allegheny General Hospital. My first day is Monday! Yikes! I'm excited and a ball of nerves all at the same time! Mostly nervous about parking and performing my job, since it's completely new to me. My background check took longer to come in than they had hoped, so my start date got pushed back two weeks. But all is how it is meant to be. I was able to stay on at the tattoo shop! But the time has come at last... Time to get the ball rolling on my career path!
Update on drinking: it turns out that i had to walk, WE had to walk, the path of learning by mistakes. We jumped right back to where we left off rather quickly. In my personal story, i immediately obsessed over the drink again; nothing else mattered. My workouts slipped away, i consumed only junk food, my time after work was spent with a drink in hand and/ or bar hopping. Thankfully, Harry had a moment of clarity and after a good, honest talk, we walked away from the bottle again. Thanksgiving, we will celebrate a month sober. What a blessing!!! I could tell we made the wromg choice by drinking again, but my alcoholism screamed louder. Thankfully, God spoke through my husband and we are returning to the light. I returned to the program of recovery i love so much and jumped right back in.
My latest spiritual journey is also on the up and up! While i've been struggling with taking on the title of Christian or not, i feel like my heart has finally settled on where it is meant to be. I finally feel ok to claim myself as a Christian. To reintroduce Christ into my heart. I know i can allow Him in and still choose to be current with my faith. I'm trying to grow in my church as well as with my family. Reading Brian "Head" Welch's autobiography truly helped me find peace with it all. Jumping into Lacey Sturm's book now about her journey out of depression to Christ!
Other updates: started filming for Jon's movie this past weekend! Everything has gone really well so far! We'll be filming weekends through the first week of December. I'm just glad we're done with the outdoor scenes, i'm sick from it!!! And i'm completely thrilled that it will be shown in a real theater... First time seeing my acting on a big screen!!! Also, this being my last week at the shop, Amber is doing a little tattoo for me on Friday.. Something harry wrote me, in his handwriting, right under my left chest... So it's close to my heart :) i'll post a photo after!

So thankful today. For all that life & God have to offer.

The Adult Life

Yesterday I had a phone interview with a woman from Allegheny General Hospital. Oh- boy- nervousness. I had applied online for the part time position of night lab processor; a job i would seek with the degree i'm working hard to get. Now, i applied in august, so i was certain my lack of experience had hurt my chances. But lo and behold, i got an email monday to set up a phone interview! And friday morning, i knocked it out of the ball park! And i secured an in- person interview tuesday morning! My only concerns now: my tattoos will be a hinderance (don't worry, i plan on wearing long sleeves and potentially toying with foundation on my hands) and that the tattoo shop will want to find someone full time to make up for me not being able to cover 5 days, thus forcing me to get a second job somewhere. Not going to lie, blog readers, i managed to have a full 365 degree rotation of feelings on this in the matter of a day! hahaha. After i got off the phone, theemotions  flowed like this: i am going to NAIL this, the job is mine! - i'm floating on clouds - i better tell everyone - oh crap, my boss just pointed out that they've preferred only having one receptionist/ shop girl - oh crap i'm going to have to find a shitty second job - oh no, allegheny health network probably hates tattoos and piercings - i'm screwed - why even bother - maybe i should cancel my interview - fuxkfuxkfuxk - AND THEN... Today came. And i felt the anxiety slowly slip away. Because i found potential solutions to shine beyond my tattoos.  Because i realized that i could find a part time position close to home somewhere just to keep my end of the finances together until AGH could offer me a full time spot. And i breathed again.
Continually, i have to offer my patience, belief, and faith to God and the greater plan. Whatever is meant to happen will. I have set the ball in motion to get a big girl job; no matter what, something good will come out of this.

Not too much time left at work,  and then it's off to the memorial service for Arlene. I look forward to reminiscing about her. There will be a LOT of tears tonight though so i will be surely keeping my makeup SUPER minimal ha.